It has often been said that if you find two or three loyal friends you are blessed. Friendships can be turbulent relationships filled with both joy and sorrow. As you graduate from the gossip of the school corridors and navigate your twenties and early thirties, it is a time of great discovery; discovery of yourself. Whilst this discovery can be both liberating and enlightening often your friendships suffer. It is during this time (your quarter life) that many get married, some decide that marriage is not for them; have the best night outs; work terrible internships as you chase your passions; you find love; fall out of love; have children and welcome parenthood; find out what you want to do and begin to find out who you are. Whilst you enter your twenties with a bunch load of friends, you find that you’re entering your thirties with one or two. What do you do when friendships end? It has been called the “female break-up” and often it is just as painful as a breakup. What do you do when you “grow apart” and “go separate ways”? We put together a list of a few things that may help you navigate this time.
It is important to remember that some people come into your life for a season. Their purpose was only for a season. That’s ok! Just because something comes to an end, doesn’t mean it failed. Enjoy the good times, cherish the memories and prepare to move and look forward to the adventures that are ahead of you.
Don’t take it personally
We can take friendship break-ups really personally and begin to pick on every flaw we have thinking that it was because something is inherently wrong with us. This is not always the case. At times, as you begin to step into more of who you are, it means you don’t quite fit where you used to. Attempting to fit into an old space will only crush you. Be true to yourself and if that means that you loose a friend or two – don’t take it personally, you have grown up and grown apart.
Don’t burn bridges
Now, we all know how dramatic we ladies can be, and when our emotions are on the line at times we can do and say things that we don’t mean. It is alright to end a friendship without the drama. Just because they are not in this season of your life, doesn’t mean that they will not be in the next. Don’t burn bridges. You can still be kind whilst you disagree.
Wish them well
This was once your friend, have a heart of joy for them and wish them well.
We are going to into a month of ‘Confidence’ where we discuss what makes us feel confident and tips on becoming more confident. To get involved in the conversation, stay connected to us on Facebook and Twitter.
W TALK was founded by Tobi Olujinmi, who believes that the Christian faith has to extend beyond a Sunday and infiltrate every dimension of our beings. Our stories and conversations help your faith do just that. Get Started
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